30something & Thriving

I recently heard a podcast by Rachel Hollis about the “Five to Thrive.”  She talks about 5 habits that she practices every single day to live a better life. Quite honestly, I wouldn’t recommend it. It was kind of cliche. No original ideas. Drink more water. Really? You’re the first to tell me this groundbreaking information.  Seriously, I’m not being a hater. I like Rachel’s podcasts, but I came up with my own little 30 & Thriving Lists.  Don’t worry. This post is more serious but still funny.

I thought seriously about my daily habits. What I do every single day that I truly believe makes a difference. Makes me feel confident. Makes me feel joy. Makes me feel happy. Makes a difference to other people. There are 13 of them. That is a theme for the 30somethings post in case you haven't picked up on it. This is what I came up with:

1. Smile at strangers.

Let me tell you something. Come in close. JJBeas is about to give you a heart to heart. A few years ago, I was sitting at Panera waiting for my to-go order. This older, African American guy comes to sit next to me and starts a small-talk conversation. I left Panera so grateful that people see me as an approachable person. They feel comfortable talking to me. The same thing happened a few weeks ago, I was running and this guy from out of town stopped to ask me directions to the Swamp Rabbit Trail (he was on it).  I thought, “what a blessing that people can sense I am someone who would help them.” I thought it was random. Then I realized, I actively do things to give people this impression. I make small-talk with the people standing next to me. I smile at strangers. I wave at passerbys. We live in a broken world void of connection. When we take the time to smile at a stranger, that is kindness. That is love. That is connecting. I want nothing in return and it didn’t cost me a penny. For the love of all things, smile at strangers.

2. Self-Care

By the time you are 30, you should have at least heard of self-care. For those who have not, the definition is self-explanatory. Treat yo’ self. I contend that every human on this planet needs to spend 30 minutes every single day doing something only for themselves. I am in love with self-care. I am a better mother. Wife. Counselor. Friend. When I take care of me. It is not selfish. It looks different for everyone- maybe a walk, reading a book, taking a bath, sitting on your porch, taking a nap (Praise Hands for Naps!!) Carve out 30 minutes every single day for you. You deserve it.

3. Get Good Sleep

When I tell you I need 8 full hours, it is not a joke. I feel better when I sleep. You will too. There is nothing on television better than your pillow.

4. Make your lunch the night before.

No matter how early I get up, every morning is a hot mess. Young has a blowout so we both have to change. I spilled coffee on my pants. I walked out to my car 3 times and realized I forgot something with every trip. Make the lunches the night before. You’re more likely to eat healthier foods and it is one less thing you have to do during the adult version of “witching hour.”

5. Make sure the bed is made.

Nothing makes me feel more like I really have my junk together than walking out of my bedroom with my bed made and my throw pillows perfectly placed. It lets me know on a soulful level “girl, you got this. Go out there and hustle, baby.” Notice I did not say, “make the bed.” Aaron Beasley makes the bed 92% of the time, and I take a supervisory role of “making sure the bed is made.” Mama ain’t got time for that.

6. Clean the kitchen.

While we are on the subject of household things, let me tell you one thing not conducive to your hustle or your mojo- walking into your kitchen and seeing the pots, pans, and wine glasses from the night before sitting on your stained counter tops. Get thee behind me, Satan.

Girl, take the extra ten minutes to load the dishwasher, wipe off the counters, and wash the 3 pans you used.

7. Wake Up Early.

Enough with cleaning. I don’t even like cleaning. The bane of my existence. I have mentioned how much I love sleep. I remember when I was 23, I worked with a gal who was 33ish. She lamented one day, “the worst part of my whole day is waking up.” I thought at the time, “oh my God. That is so sad. I love waking up.” Now I know what she means. Not waking up but GETTING up. I wake up at 5:30. Monday-Friday. Very few exceptions. I have to wake up at 6:30 to get to work on time. That one hour is everything. It is 30 minutes of self-care and 30 minutes of exercise and 1 whole hour of quiet. It makes a difference in my whole life. It is balance. It is necessary.

8. Spiritual Practice

This is a nice segue. My spiritual practice occurs during that 5:30-6:00 time frame. I make a cup of coffee. I read my Savor devotional (Shauna Niequist). I pray. Every morning. I spend time reflecting, critically thinking, nourishing soul and praying. Y’all. I never thought I would be that girl. Notice, I said spiritual practice, not religious practice. You don’t have to be a christian to engage in spiritual practice. You might spend your time journaling or doing yoga or meditating or drawing. Whatever your jam is, fill your spirit before you embark on this day.

9. Read More.

Just do it. One chapter per day. Not facebook articles. Not the news. Pick up a book. Like the paper ones, not your fancy kindle. Read a chapter. 10 pages. Don’t tell me you can’t because I will give you the side eye.

10. Go Outside.

Spend time outdoors. I love being outside. Sometimes it is running around the yard with my toddler. Walking around the neighborhood. Driveway cocktails with my neighbors. Grill & Chill with my husband. Sitting on my porch alone. Doesn't matter. Just make it happen. Go outside. Every day. If it raining, just sit by a window or something.

11. Be Active.

Do something active every day. Shopping counts. I burned 150 calories chasing chickens around my yard on a Tuesday morning. We release endorphins when we are active. It is basically a free drug. In the words of Elle Woods, “Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy. Happy people don't kill their husbands. They just don't.” So there’s that.

12. Say Good Morning to People.

This takes us back to number 1. You know what people do when you say “good morning”? They smile at you. They say “Good Morning.” How do you feel when people smile at you? If you answered anything besides “I feel great when people smile at me,” then I am recommending a psych eval. PSA for first time morning greeters: the person may respond with “how are you?” They do not actually care. Just mumble “great” “good” “fine.”

13. Eat your Veggies.

No joke. This is not like drink more water. BeachBody taught me this. I owe it all to my girl Autumn and the 21Day Fix, eat your stinking vegetables. I eat at minimum 3 cups of veggies every single day. None of them have cheese or ranch dressing on them. Vegetables will make a difference in your life. If you are what you eat, I am a big ole pan of sauteed onions.